memika2981-mpyrd

Yesterday morning started like every other peaceful morning in our lovely little community. We were enjoying breakfast preparations and discussing important matters such as snacks, worm inventory, and whether or not Buttercup was, once again, sitting in someone else’s nesting box.
Present were myself, Henrietta, along with Mabel, Daisy Mae, Buttercup, and Nugget.
Everything was normal.
Until she arrived.
Now listen, we all know Mary E. Poppins. The giant human woman with the green shirt who enters our kingdom daily carrying suspicious buckets and speaking to us in that weird baby voice humans use.
“Who’s a pretty chicken?!”
Ma’am. We are grown women.
Anyway, she opened the coop doors and began tossing snacks everywhere. Naturally, chaos broke out. Nugget forgot all manners and sprinted across the coop like she’d never seen food before. Buttercup announced she was pretty sure this was a trap. Mabel was trying to maintain order, and Daisy Mae was pretending she was above the drama while absolutely being invested in every second.
Meanwhile Nugget had already swallowed three treats whole and was yelling:
“I DON’T HAVE TIME TO CHEW!”
And then…
Kung Pow noticed something.
Mary bent down.
The entire coop froze.
Now understand something about Kung Pow Rooster. He takes his position as Head of Security very seriously. Too seriously, honestly. Last week he attacked a rake because it “looked suspicious.”
The week before that he fought his own reflection in the water bucket.
Lost.
We watched him slowly turn his head.
We watched his little eyes narrow.
Henrietta whispered, “Oh no…”
Mabel whispered, “Not again…”
Daisy Mae sighed and said, “Somebody get the incident report paperwork ready.”
Buttercup quietly added:
“Do we still have workers compensation?”
Then we saw it happen.
Kung Pow took off running like a feathered missile. Full speed. Wings out. Pure chaos.
Mabel yelled:
“SIR, THAT IS AN UNAUTHORIZED FLIGHT PATH!”
He jumped onto his perch dramatically — because of course he did — and before anyone could stop him…
HE LAUNCHED.
Straight at Mary’s head.
Now I would like the official record to show: we did not authorize this mission.
Next thing we know Mary starts screaming, spinning, ducking, and windmilling her arms around like one of those inflatable tube men outside car dealerships.
Nugget screamed:
“SHE’S DOING THE DANCE! SHE’S DOING THE DANCE!”
Then—
BONK.
She smacked her own head on the doorway.
Silence.
Absolute silence.
Even Kung Pow looked surprised.
One piece of straw slowly floated through the air.
Buttercup quietly said:
“Well… that escalated quickly.”
Daisy Mae leaned over and whispered:
“Should… should someone check on her?”
Long pause.
“No? Okay.”
Mary retreated from the battlefield looking wounded and confused while Kung Pow stood there puffed up like he’d personally won a war.
Meanwhile the five of us gathered in the corner.
Mabel: “He’s gonna talk about this for weeks.”
Nugget: “Months.”
Buttercup: “He’s already posing.”
Daisy Mae: “I guarantee he writes about this in his journal tonight.”
Henrietta: “He’s absolutely going to tell the ducks he fought a bear.”
And sure enough, as we watched him strut away, we heard him mutter:
“Threat neutralized.”
Sir.
You attacked a woman holding snack buckets.
As for Mary… we suspect she’ll return.
She always does.
But next time?
We’re staying near the back of the coop.
Because frankly, living with Kung Pow Rooster is exhausting.
— Henrietta, Mabel, Daisy Mae, Buttercup & Nugget
Witnesses to the Chaos
Residents of Feathered Acres
Survivors of Kung Pow’s Security Team